Your Relatives Aren't Watching Over You - Satan Is


Oh those wacky Seventh Day Adventists.

We have a lot of those particular believers in this area, or at least they're the most active with their door to door proselytizing. Today a couple of upstanding youths came to the door and B-rad answered and was surprisingly polite. They kind of took him by surprise I think and they didn't stay to chat. I always delight in taking a look at the literature they without fail leave behind and once again, I am simply floored by the insanity that is being passed off as logical explanations of common phenomena.

The first hand out was pretty neutral - come to this nine day religious camp, Christian music, vegan cookie classes, blah blah blah. The smaller pamphlet that came with the hand out, however, was amazing.

The pamphlet is titled "Dead Men Don't Talk" which naturally excited me since I expected it to be largely concerning pirates. I was disappointed, however, to read that it was just about how if you think you hear your dead loved ones talking to you, it isn't really them.

Oh. OK, well, that's not as rad as pirates, but I agree - I don't think dead people can chat it up with the living. I mean, it's impossible to prove for sure an- what? Say again? So, it's not your dead relatives talking to you from beyond the grave - it's "deceiving spirits and doctrines of demons." (1 Timothy 4:1)

Silly me, and I thought we were taking the fucking logical position for a minute.

That shit is crazy. Isn't that seriously crazy? That people think that when you feel lost or afraid or tired or lonely or whatever and you hear a loved one who passed on talking to you in your head, maybe making you feel a little better, that you ought to assume it's Satan trying to invade your brain with his deceptive fallen angel army of evil.

Well of course. I mean really, why not? Once you've dedicated yourself to believing that there is for sure some god that not only created us but wants us to worship it, you might as well believe that the imagined consolation of your dead loved ones is actually Satan trying to deceive you.

And the pamphlet continues, yadda yadda yadda, give us money - the end.